from Chapter 22 Coping with Stress

Did I ever post this article about Children in Emerging Churches (2005) from Don Stott's blog. Scroll down his blog to 9.26.06 about children's biggest fears. That's probably enough of a post in itself. When you come back, here's Chapter 22 of Children's Spirituality - research about the spiritual influences that help children cope with stress.

This chapter is written by Sara Pendleton- a professor of pediatrics, Ethan Benore- a doctor in Clinical Psychology, Katherine Jonas - a counselor, Wendy Norwood- who also has a counseling degree, and Carol Herrmann who has conducted studies of missionaries and their children. Alot of this was more clinical than I was willing to wade through but here are some interesting thoughts:

"Children are not just 'little adults.'" (CS p 363) There are three things that often influence a child's coping strategies:

-religious/spiritual development which seems closely tied to cognitive development
-social influences (a child's family and faith community) which can be positive or negative
-supernatural influences - (surprisingly) acknowledged by these particular researchers as a significant factor

It appears that "Children [as opposed to adults?mh] are more likely to rely on God during times of stress rather than avoid God's help and cope autonomously." (CS p. 370)

Children having a model of resilience is an important influence. MK's (children of missionaries) in particular often face the stress of living and traveling between different societies, poor living conditions, adjusting to new people and environments, work-related separation from parents and siblings, political unrest. (CS p. 374) I'd venture to guess that any one of these would be stressors for children who aren't MK's. MK's probably face these stressors more than most. Research has shown the modeling of their parents a very significant influence.

This is an important observation in today's world even off the mission field - a time when both parents are often so committed to their careers, : "When MKs felt valued by their parents and integrated into their parents' mission, they demonstrated a positvie attitude toward their situation, their role as MKs, and their parents' work. . . when MKs felt their parents placed their work first, and spent a minimum amount of time or were minimally involved with them, they experienced and expressed negative attitudes with reference to growing up in a missionary environment." (CS p. 375) The second half of this is probably a good example of faith coping strategies back-firing.

Most of these researchers see children battling serious illness. This is the primary stressor used in the beginning of the chapter. When a child's worldview, the adults in their lives, and God's healing influence re-enforce God's unconditional love for them and His presence with them it leaves the child able to cope in what we would consider a positive way. If a child's worldview leaves him/her asking what he/she did wrong, why God is punishing him/her, or interceding with the expectation of divine intervention, as God's expression of love, only to get worse - this doesn't have a positive affect on the child's ability to cope. I hope I interpreted what they were saying correctly.

"...children who view God as ever-present, benevolent, and view themselves as personally responsible for maintaining a strong relationship with God and strong religious/spiritual life, may in the process develop a buffer against the impact of stressful events. [A worldview like this] along with child and family religious/spiritual behaviours, may foster the style of coping and use of specific coping strategies which are most beneficial to children." ( CS 375-376)

The next section- and a separate post- is particularly for those who work with kids .